It was a successful surgery today for Daddy. Only 4 bypasses. Anna and Stephen were there with Mom. Now for the hard part--recovery from open-heart surgery.
Also, I stirred the pot of my past with my counselor this morning, and it haunted me all day. I am thankful that there is full restoration of my brokenness in Christ. Praying now that I will focus on His goodness that He redeemed me from the deep pit of my sins vs. on what my reality was in the pit. I cannot know the joy of my salvation if I don't recognize my great need for a Savior. And I was a desperate girl. And He saved me...redeemed me...gave me new life. Joy! Joy! Joy!
Oh, that my children can learn from others and not have to experience for themselves such personal tragedies in order to appreciate their own desparate need for God!
It struck me as I was falling asleep last night--the most beautiful and gut-wrenching part of the above is that I am FORGIVEN. That is where I need to rest. He truly forgives me for my sins against Him. And He loves me, really loves me, anyway. He not only doesn't hold my past against me, making me pay over and over for my wrongdoings, but he cherishes me and lavishes me with His love so far beyond what I deserve. I mean, he gave me Brian Brown. But even if he didn't bless me with Brian, his wrath against me is satiated by Christ and I am still forgiven. I can hardly forgive myself, and yet my just and holy God forgives me. And my heart sings for joy as the tears stream down my face.
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