Tears are fresh today. Not sure exactly why today; it's not much different than yesterday. I think I'm seeing and feeling brokenness very keenly. I did change the title of the blog because I've been posting things that are GOOD and encouraging, but today I'm of the perspective that it's not supposed to be this way.
Death is ugly. Need hurts. Sin is abundant. Fear lurks. Struggle is hard. But refinement is good. Thank God this is not all in vain!
we recently had a situation crop up that had the potential to be very hard and require a lot out of me physically, emotionally, and spiritually. when i would dwell on even just what the physical requirments would be - childcare for the biggest two, pregnancy and/or caring for a newborn, continuing to care for our home while being out of it frequently - i was more than overwhelmed. eric and i had a conversation about how i was processing the situation and i surprised even myself. my answer? "I feel like the Spirit keeps reminding me that He is sufficient to meet all of our needs. We may only know how we are going to make it through this literally one day at a time, and we may be very needy, but isn't that just where He wants us? Needing Him?"
ReplyDeleteI have a mantra that I (sadly) have to quote to myself frequently, "I'm supposed to need Jesus. I am not supposed to be able to do this alone."
Praying for you, Friend.
P.S. to our great delight and relief the Lord has once again gone before us and spared us from what would have been a life-changing situation.